15 Things Mommas Need to Know Before Giving Birth

This may seem like a lot of information, but I promise it is so worth it. With that said, let's get into it!

Your medical staff works for YOU!

I am amazed by the amount of people that aren’t told that they don’t have to do everything (or anything) their doctor/nurses tell them. If you are offered an unnecessary intervention, you don’t have to accept it. You are the boss, and you have rights. No one can legally make you do anything you don’t want to do. Don’t let anyone scare you into thinking otherwise. (This is one reason that hiring a doula for your birth is so beneficial). **This is not me saying that you shouldn't listen to your doctor, just that they are someone who you've hired, not someone who can make you do something you don't want to or are uncomfortable with.

Find your support team and make sure they are your biggest supporters.

Whether you’re planning a hospital, birth center, or home birth, it’s so important to have people there who are going to support, encourage and comfort you. Now is not the time to allow anyone negative into your peaceful birth space. Your spouse/partner, a doula, and/or a very supportive and respectful midwife/OB are all going to help make sure that you are well taken care of and heard. Remember, this is your birth story, and although you may not get to write it completely alone (because unpredictability), you have the biggest say in what happens during it. Make sure the people you choose for your team are 100% there for you.

The benefit of creating a birth plan isn’t just so that you and your provider know what type of birth you’d prefer to have, but even more so that you become more educated about typical practices and the many benefits/risks associated with birth options.

This one is really important because educating yourself helps you become your own best advocate. It doesn’t matter what type of birth you want to have. You should go into it fully prepared and knowing at least something about what’s going to happen. Imagine you are going to be doing a triathlon in about 9.5 months…even if you had the best coaches with you, would you show up the day of without a single day of training? (The answer is no…) Read a book, attend a childbirth class, and research your hospital’s practices and policies.

*I used Mama Natural's Customizable birth plan, and my nurses loved how easy it was to read!

Research and practice non-medical comfort techniques.

Yes, even if you’re planning on getting pain meds or an epidural…know some non-medical ways to cope with labor pains in the event that those don’t work! Unfortunately, birth really is unpredictable, so you never fully know how your body is going to respond to a medication. At least give yourself a plan b so you can help yourself out!! If you’re planning a non-medicated birth, this is going to be the most important thing you can do.

Get baby in the best position possible for birth.

The most optimal position for baby in the womb for birth is called LOA (Left Occiput Anterior). This position is when baby is head down with their back facing your front. This allows for the smallest part of the head to come into the birth canal first, which makes labor easier in the long-run! Check out spinningbabies.com for more information on how to get baby into the best position possible!

I don’t think I can say this loud enough, but…DUE DATES ARE NOT EVACUATION DATES!

There is a TON of evidence out there that shows that due dates are estimates and shouldn’t be counted on as the exact day baby should be born. Literally, less than 5% of all mommas give birth on their due date. The average first time momma gives birth about 8 days past their estimated due date. But, this is so important to talk about because some doctors/hospitals pressure mommas into medically unnecessary inductions before due dates based on old practices *insert medical exemptions here because of course there are some*. Bottom line, you could be pregnant anywhere from 37-42 weeks (or shorter or longer), and that’s okay! Yes, those last few weeks are hard sometimes, but trying to get your baby out sooner purely out of convenience isn’t the answer and can even be dangerous. You’re a momma who loves and sacrifices for your babies, so take it one day at a time…I promise, that sweet babe will be here before you know it!

When in doubt about something during labor, run it through the B.R.A.I.N.:

This is a great tool to use when offered a medication, intervention, or procedure during labor. You can assess the Benefits, ask about the Risks, enquire about any Alternatives, follow your own Intuition (what is your gut feeling about it?), and say No/Not Now. I learned about this in a childbirth class that I took, and it’s so helpful!

When babies are first born, their stomachs are very small and gradually get bigger.

This is one HUGE reason that mommas feel the need to supplement so soon after birth. In short, you’ll produce a concentrated milk called Colostrum for the first few days until your mature milk comes in (on average, about 3-5 days postpartum, excluding special circumstances such as trauma, <possibly> cesarean, preterm, etc). You don’t produce a lot because baby doesn’t need a lot at first (and it’s extremely concentrated and packed with amazing nutrition). If baby is having enough wet diapers a day (about 7-8), they’re good!

Let that umbilical cord pulse!

Have you heard about Delayed Cord Clamping? It’s simply allowing the cord to stay unclamped and intact/uncut until it has stopped pulsating and turned completely white. Doing so allows baby to receive all that blood back from the placenta into their own body, which can improve iron levels for up to 6 months, among other benefits for momma and baby. WHO recommends delaying clamping for at least 1 minute after birth.

Speaking of the placenta, it can take anywhere from 5-20+ minutes to birth.

Now, this may not seem important, but it is! Some doctors prefer to get them out as quickly as possible (within 5 or so minutes after birth), but that’s not necessary and can cause excessive bleeding/hemorrhaging if tugged on too hard. Obviously no one wants that to happen, so you can ask to have it left alone until it’s ready. Having baby latch can also help to encourage your body to push it out. I added this one because I’ve heard trauma stories about this scenario happening near me and thought it important to include!

Take advantage of The Golden Hour!

This is the first hour (or more) after your sweet babe has been born! During this time, there are so many benefits for momma and baby such as increased bonding, increased latching/breastfeeding success, regulation of temperature for baby, hormone releases for momma and more! It’s so much good stuff packed into some peaceful skin-to-skin alone time with baby and parents. So, if you’re physically able to do so, take advantage of this time! If you have a c-section, ask about being able to have skin-to-skin with baby immediately after delivery if all looks well.

Know and understand that even with all the planning in the world, sometimes things don’t go the way we had hoped.

As I’ve said, birth is one unpredictable beast! I personally had a birth plan and knew exactly what I wanted, but my birth story didn’t go exactly how I wanted it to. Do I think I wasted my time planning? No way. If I hadn’t, things would’ve gone a bit differently. With that said, no matter what your birth story looks like, treasure it in some way. If it was really hard on you, talk to someone about it and get help if necessary. If it was so incredible, share it with others! We need more positive birth stories out there where there are many negative ones. We can’t fully control birth, but we can use our stories to help others in one way or another. I truly believe that there is healing in doing so as well.

If breastfeeding is challenging and/or painful, there is always help available! (Even free)

If you really want to breastfeed, don’t let poor support or misinformation ruin your journey! I see way too many mommas who don’t want to stop do so because they were told they can’t do it, don’t make enough milk, etc, even though they can, but just need some help. Find a La Leche League meeting near you, go see an IBCLC (International Board Certified Lactation Consultant), and do your research. I even learned a lot from a facebook group run by an IBCLC…there’s help everywhere if you look for it! And remember, pediatricians and other doctors aren’t trained lactation specialists (unless they chose to do some further education). They may be able to give you some advice, but seeing someone who’s actually an expert is going to give you the best results. Yes, it’s challenging, but you can do this. (I could write an entire post full of information, but I’ll leave it at this for now). At the end of the day, feed your baby however you feel is best. Just know that if you don't want to stop breastfeeding, but are at a loss, find help first.

Postpartum is its own unique journey.

Some quick facts about postpartum:

- Most women bleed (called Lochia) for about 6 weeks on average. The important thing to keep an eye on is that you don’t have any blood clots bigger than the size of a golf ball. (Also, Depends adult diapers are a lifesaver!!)

- Stock up on supplies and have everything ready before you go into labor. I made a basket for the bathroom that had pads, adult diapers, perineum spray, and some witch hazel pads all right by the toilet for easy access. Get yourself a peri-bottle! The hospital will likely give you one, but I bought the Frida Mom Peri Bottle and it was amazing.

- Expect afterbirth pains. They feel a bit like labor contractions and are basically helping your uterus shrink back down to it’s pre-baby size. I would get them every time I heard my baby cry or while breastfeeding. Sure it’s pain, but just think about how it’s a good pain that shows that your body is doing what it’s supposed to do!

- Make sure you have some solid support! Have a nice friend set up a meal train, have your spouse help with other things that you’d normally do, make sure you rest as much as possible and soak in all the baby bonding time that you can!

Labor is challenging…but you can and will be able to do it!!

Yes, many women have painful birth experiences (although some don’t…feel free to ask me about it because it's pretty amazing!), but you WILL get through it. Your body is literally and physiologically designed to do so. Trust your body and yourself. Have no fear and birth that baby! You’re amazing, even if you don’t know it yet.